Archive for the 'Hollywood Types' Category

I Don’t Believe It

Rappers committing crimes? Say it isn’t so.

PHOENIX —  Rapper DMX was sentenced to 90 days in jail Friday for convictions of theft, drug-possession and animal-cruelty charges.

DMX, whose real name is Earl Simmons, also was placed on at least 18 months’ supervised probation by Maricopa County Superior Court Commissioner Phemonia Miller.

What is the world coming to?

Retard

That’s all I have to say about that.

Paris Hilton, Meet Justice

Paris Hilton, after being released from jail prematurely,was sent back. Crying and screaming for her mommy…

Awww, too bad. She actually has to face the same consequences as the rest of us. Boo Hoo.

Talk About Letting Yourself Go

Guess who this is:

Guess Who?

No, it’s not the old hag from “Throw Mama From The Train”, it’s…

Barbara Streisand.

Yeesh, that’s disgusting.

At Least Now I Don’t Have To Spend Those Millions Of Dollars

I was the winning bidder for a particular item on eBay, however, the auction was ended because I was disqualified. Imagine that.

The fears of sleeping with a stranger have finally been alleviated for actress Carmen Electra, as the man, whose offer was one of the highest in an online bidding for a date with the sexy beauty, has been disqualified.


The former Baywatch star, who is married to rocker Dave Navarro, recently offered her fans to buy the chance to take her out, on the internet auction site eBay.com, but she now regrets being so crazy, as the huge amounts of cash that were bid for a date with her, left her highly concerned.


“They were bidding for a date with me on eBay, which was kind of weird, but the money went to charity, so I thought it would be a nice thing to do,” Contactmusic quoted her, as saying.


“It went up to some crazy number and I actually felt obligated to, like, sleep with the guy. But I didn’t, because they were disqualified,” she added.

Actually, I’m quite relieved. The mission of the starship Enterprise was to “boldy go where no man has gone before”. In hindsight, to boldly go where Dennis Rodman has been before was beginning to worry me.

And Now, Deep Thoughts, By Madonna

From a recent interview:


“At the end of the day when I’m standing at the golden gates, I’m sure God doesn’t give a shit how many records I’ve sold or how many number one hits I’ve had,” Madonna said in an interview with Britain’s Observer. “All He gives a shit about is how I behaved, how I treated people. So understanding that, and still doing my best making records, is the conclusion I’ve come to. I think about that more now than I used to.”

I guess I can skip church this week.

Scary Stuff

Someone over at Double Agent is pretty damned good with a Photoshop brush. They have a gallery of what stars will look like in the future, and it ain’t pretty. Here’s a sample:


Gwen Stefani


Nicole Kidman


Paris Hilton


And last but not least…


Jessica Simpson


Man, that last one is just giving me the creeps.

Paris Hilton Is An Old Lady

Or at least, she’d like you to believe as much:

Actress Paris Hilton, the heir of the Hilton fortune, is going incognito trying to avoid the press after she broke off her engagement with her fianc

This Week’s Movie

I haven’t seen “War of the Worlds” yet, and was thinking about seeing it this weekend, but after reading this, I think I’ll pass.


A screenwriter for the blockbuster film “War of the Worlds” says the malevolent Martian attackers represent the American military randomly slaughtering Iraqi civilians.

Dave Koepp voiced his controversial explanation of the movie script to an obscure Canadian horror magazine titled Rue Morgue, “apparently thinking no one would notice,” writes U.S. News columnist John Leo.

What a dunce.

Be Careful, Tom

Just in time for the release of his next movie, Tom Cruise is suddenly splashed all over the headlines because he’s now dating Katie Holmes. Which, oddly enough, both of their publicists were denying just a week or so ago. I’ll admit, she is cute.


Katie Holmes


But she doesn’t always look like that. Especially when she’s having an, er, outbreak.


Katie Holmes


Not quite so cute in that photo.